


Life and Undeath

by EdamamiTomoe



Category: Zombieland Saga (Anime)
Genre: there's nothing i can really think of with which to tag this fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-28
Updated: 2018-12-28
Packaged: 2019-09-29 07:18:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17199041
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EdamamiTomoe/pseuds/EdamamiTomoe
Summary: Sakura ruminates about her undeath and various what-ifs.





	Life and Undeath

A howl from Romero from atop the roof of the manor marks how late at night it is when Kotaro came out onto the balcony for a breath of fresh air, and finds Sakura there, gazing up at the night sky. A smile and a wave from the stargazer, and Kotaro joins her by her side.

“You’re up late.” Kotaro notes as he retrieves some squid from his breast pocket to chew on. A late night snack not really out of preference, but out of convenience. 

“Yeah. I’ve just been thinking about some things.” Sakura’s tone is light, and a smile marks her face, a reassurance to Kotaro as she broaches the subject. “Ever since I regained my memories, I’ve been thinking about how everything has gone. From my life, to my… undeath.”

“Oh?”

“Mhm.”

“...” Kotaro at this point would have yelled for an explanation, if he hasn’t sensed that this is a serious moment in which his seriousness is due. So instead, he just asks plainly, “What about it?”

“Oh, you know,” the way Sakura begins and then pauses tests Kotaro’s willingness not to yell, but then she continues, “undeath is a really strange thing, you know? I’m happy I got to become an idol like I’ve always wanted, and yet I can’t help but wonder how differently my life might have gone if I didn’t die that day. If I had graduated alongside you, gone to college or pursued a career as an idol…”

“...Is it really worth thinking about?” Kotaro asks plainly, gazing out at the night sky with her.

“Heheh, I know it’s not.” It seems like this is something Sakura has already thought of profoundly before Kotaro approached her. “I know, I really am grateful for this chance I have been given. Becoming a zombie was… a strange experience, but it’s given me new friends closer to me than any friends have ever been, it’s given me my dream of becoming an idol, it’s even helped me with my self esteem issues. Which I never thought I would get over.

“But still, it’s hard not to think about how differently my life would have gone if I remained alive. Would my dreams of becoming an idol end the same way all of my other dreams have? Would I have ended up going to college instead? I still don’t know much about what you did after you graduated, but you did go to work in Hollywood like you wanted… would I have gone with you? Would we have ended up together, like we wanted…?”

“Let’s not go there.” Kotaro adjusts his shades, rebuking Sakura’s dreamy tone, “I know we had feelings then, but that was 10 years ago. I’m 10 years older than you now, and our age gap is only going to increase, as you’re never going to age. That would be really weird.”

“Heheh, you’re right, you’re right.”

“Besides, we have a very different relationship now. I’m your producer, and we can’t have a scandal like that together. It would be better if we keep it professional.”

“I know ~”

For a moment after Sakura’s giggling, only silence remains between the two, as they looked up at the night sky at the waxing moon, at the stars, before she speaks again.

“I wouldn’t give my undeath up for a what-if life though.” She turns her gaze to meet Kotaro’s shades with a smile in her eyes, “I probably would have just lived the rest of my life carrying the same burdens as I did before I died, and that honestly doesn’t sound very fun. I’m happy with my undeath, and… I’m thankful that you brought me back, Kotaro.”

As she says that, Sakura affectionately leans her head against Kotaro, a gesture that causes Kotaro to jump back and yell, “CHASTE INTEractions only!! We’re producer and idol we cant be having that kind of relationship”

Kotaro’s yelling quickly diminishing into a loud whisper as soon as he realizes that it’s pretty late at night and all the other girls are sleeping made Sakura laugh, although she does also keep her voice from getting too loud. It’s just always amusing to see the always-mysterious-yet-also-always-silly Kotaro being flustered like that.

Soon enough though, Sakura finds herself yawning. “I think I’m going to go back to bed now. Not that I really need to sleep, but it would be nice to.”

“Mm, yeah. You still got a big live coming up in a few days.”

“Mhmm.”

Before she heads inside, Sakura gives Kotaro one more smile, and says, “Hehe, thanks for tonight, Kotaro.”

“Don’t mention it.”

As Kotaro is left alone to gaze upon the night sky and to chew upon his squid snacks, he catches himself wondering too how life might have gone differently. As he has told Sakura though, he tells himself that there’s no use wondering about an unachievable and likely undesirable reality, and satisfies himself knowing that he would much rather have things no other way.


End file.
